January complete - CHECK

Today marks the end to the first month of the year and it has been a busy one and boy has it flown by.  Thirty-one days ago I started a continuing journey to a healthier me.  After an amazing year before, the final months of 2013 kinda fell apart.  I hit some rough patches, fell back into some old habits, and let some of the big weight loss come back.

It has been a month of ups and downs, laughter and tears, fighting the old habits, continuing the grow and learn more about myself.  I know that I am far from perfect, but I have learned over the last year that my flaws have helped to make me the person I am (both good and bad).  Take me as I am, no matter that number on the scale, or the size of my clothes I will always be the same (maybe with a few tweaks here and there).

A little recap on the month -

Soda habit - I have cut WAY back.  It was really tough in the beginning of the month after getting back to drinking it a ton.  I am down to one or two a week, which is a huge improvement to where I was a month ago.  I honestly don't know if I will ever be able to completely give it up, but it will definitely be very limited.

Emotional Eating - I have pretty much reconciled with the fact that this will never go away.  The key to this for me anyway is to try to keep myself occupied with other things and to surround myself with healthier choices and alternatives.  I am human and I will occasionally give into the trigger foods, but that is reality we are talking about.

Exercise - This has been an area that has always remained strong, even during those few month I gained some of my weight back.  No exercise is not an option for so many reasons - health-wise (physically and emotionally).  Exercise not only makes me feel better but makes me happy and can completely turn around an emotional day.  That being said, after making that calendar showing all of my classes and activity maybe (and I'm still not convinced) I am doing too much sometimes.  I can at least say that I getting a lot of variety and not just sticking with one thing.  As I see some people around me struggling and dealing with injuries I must be mindful of and listen to my body.  When it needs a rest, I need to give it one (as hard as it might be).  Exercise is such a key in this overall picture and not being able to do it would crush me for so many reasons.

Planning - This was one of the many reasons for my successes in the past and my downfall during the rough patch.  I find that planning truly keeps me in check.  Always knowing I have things ready to go, something in fridge prepared keeps me from going to the old "convenience foods" and fast food stops.  It really can be a lot of work but it is so worth it.

Weight  - After gaining back 29.4 pounds of the 102 I lost I have managed to lose 14.8 pounds this month.  The first three weeks were some pretty good numbers.  I chalked this up to getting back into the regular habits from last year.  It truly reminds me the difference that these changes made and why I was so successful.  The last week was a no move week.  I was eating a lot more in that week (but at least healthier).  I know that if I want to lose weight I have to enjoy some of these higher calorie (but nutritious) foods in moderation.  This may also mean going back to logging food into my journal for awhile, but I'm not sure about this yet.  Need to think about it some more and see how the next few weeks go.  While that number on the scale is important (I still do not have a goal weight because I have not been this small in SO many years, it would be really great to see that first number start with a "ONE") I have come to realize it is really a pretty small piece on the big picture. 

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The last few days I haven't been feeling myself.  One of my ears is clogged up and it is throwing me off, my equilibrium, my balance.  I tend to have issues with wax buildup, I'm really hoping this is what it is this time.  I'm going to to try to loosen this up and hope that this helps.  If this isn't what it is as much as I hate to  I will need to go to the doctors and get it figured out.  I definitely can't be dizzy during classes, I'm afraid I will hurt myself.  Twice during my Thursday night classes I felt like the room was spinning which didn't feel good at all.  It happened again this morning in Combat class.  I fought through it and just have to hope it goes away in the next few days.

Today brought the end of the two fitness challenge calendars I was doing.  Man, what a month.  Let's start with "The Shrinking Jeans Squat and Push-UP 31 Day Bootcamp"...WOW.  From day 1 doing 24 squats and 10 pushups to finishing day 31 with 150 squats and 90 pushups, what a difference a month makes.  I do lots of squats in my Body Pump class at the gym but these were so much different.  Since I didn't have weights I felt like I could really focus on the technique of my squat, really drop it low, and get the most benefit out of it.  I feel like this has also helped me in class.  I do my squats so much better now, and yes it sure does help with the ass.  I know I can't see it because it is behind me, but the shadow following me doesn't seem so big anymore...lol.  As far as the pushups, these have always been a weakness of mine, I never had the upper body strength.  In the course of the month I went from doing them all "girly style" on my knees to mixing up a a combination of "girly" and full pushup.  My arms just feel so much stronger.  For the "Well Girl Challenge" this was a mix of a lot of different exercises, some of which I had never done before.  Some days were difficult.  I would say my hardest of these exercises was the Plank & Row.  I couldn't do them the way they were intended, I had to modify, but at least I did them.  My first thought was to just skip them all together but I knew I had to do what I could.  I really enjoyed the overall body workout with this calendar.  I have tried to do fitness calendars before so gun-ho on doing them but then would always give up a quarter to halfway through.  I am so proud of myself for sticking with both of these on top of doing my regular classes at the gym.  There were some night that it was tough.  But what a feeling to be able to check off each day (I even gave myself a start for each day finished).

 Today reminded me of one thing I really need to work on....accepting compliments.  I've never done this very well.  One of the ladies I work with today told me that I looked so slimming in my jeans.  My response - "well I don't know about that, need to do a lot more, but thanks".  I really need to learn to accept them not add my own commentary.  I am truly a work in progress and that also goes for the way I look at and think of myself.  Even with the weight loss some days I still see that fat girl in the mirror.  I really have a hard time seeing the progress.  I do though believe I have gotten much better and am not nearly as hard on myself as I have been in the past.

As I begin a new month I will take the things I have learned, adjust the things that need to be, and move forward.  Learn from the past, grow from the present, and move forward into the future.

Here's to a fabulous February!!!